I started this blog with such great intentions... such high hopes of what it would become, and now, here it sits, covered in a thick layer of dust, unused, undeveloped, unread...
What happened?
Life happened.
My hectic life happened.
My crazy, out of control, shoes flopping around in a dryer life came along and squashed the crap out of any hopes that I may have had for my personal little blog.
I want to try my best to dust it off and revive it.
Though I am still in no place to make any commitments. My life is still so upside down that I do not know which way is up anymore. I don't know where I am going to be next year... next month... next week? I don't know what I am going to be doing with my life - my future has been smudged over as if I have taken off my glasses and am trying to focus on it with my own blurry near-sided vision. I cannot make it out. I do not know what lies ahead...
I do know that my life is NOT where I thought it would be at this point.
I am months away from turning 29. I am creeping ever so close to 30...
I am married. I have one child. We are a happy little family.
All of that is not really so unexpected. I have always wanted a family, so that much is not a surprise... but I sure as hell never expected to be living my life without my Mom at this point!!
But I digress...
I do not want to bring my depression into this blog. I have another more personal private blog where I pour out my pain...
I just mention it in terms of where I am in my life.
So, where do I go from here?
I am trying very desparately to figure that out actually.
I have always been such a planner...
This uncertainty is driving me insane!
What I do know is this...
I will go forward into this unknown future holding the hand of the man I love. We will bring our son with us on whatever adventures we embark upon, and we will be happy.
Maybe not every moment of every day, but we will be happy.
This much I know!
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